I just got around to seeing Final Fantasy: Advent Children (I know, I know, I’m way behind the curve) and I gotta say, people, I am dissapointed. Why? You have to ask why???

CAIT SITH IS RELEGATED TO THE BACK.

I was sated when I got my pittance of Yuffie (with whom I share a birthday), and damn if I didn’t like literally whoop when she started lobbing her ridiculous throwing star at shit, all out-of-my-chair rodeo fan style, kicking over my chair and pressing my greasy fingers to my cheeks, my mouth a perfect “O” of delight. But come ONNN, Squaresoft; you go to the trouble to design an adorable cat-prince or cat-king who rides a giant stuffed yeti, and you stick him behind Barrett? Barrett, whose appeal in FFVII amounted to, as far as I was concerned, saying “shit?” Once?

All I’m saying is this. You know how that Pokemon movie came out, way back when, and while there was a whole feature-length film with a plot and characterization and words, they had that featurette in front of it? “Pikachu’s Summer Vacation?” All that thing did was get the fanservice out of the way, Psyduck all being a total dick and Pikachu scenery-chewing and everyone’s perennial favorites trotting around the background, so that by the time you got to the actual film, nobody cared that Vulpix got three seconds of screentime, because Vulpix was totally prancing just ten minutes ago, prancing with her fancy hooves picked up in the air just so.

A Cait Sith featurette. That’s all I wanted. Just let the dude gambol and cavort a little, yeah? I didn’t level him up to 99 because he was useful.